What if Hamid Ansari was a...…!

Last week, when the entire nation was watching anxiously the action packed drama being ‘enacted’ in the Rajya sabha, Hamid Ansari unexpectedly brought down the curtains resulting in an anti climax. Just like Obama along with his core team was watching live the ‘Kill Osama’ operation in Abbottabad at midnight, the team Anna (and the nation) was also watching ‘Kill Lokpal’ operation by the politicians in Rajya Sabha. And no doubt, they did an excellent job out of it.

The expertise with which the members of Parliament killed Lokpal, everyone was left awestruck and dumbfounded. There was a murder happening in front of live cameras watched by national audience, yet all the culprits came out ‘victorious’ with their version of the story, which exonerated them of any wrong doing and held other parties responsible.

During the entire discussions in Rajya Sabha, the congress challenged BJP and the opposition parties to show courage by passing the bill and not delay the process by endless debates. The BJP and other parties ridiculed the bill by proposing 187 amendments and said that they cannot pass a substandard bill. Both are right and yet both are wrong. The fact is that none of the parties are really interested in that bill. They were only trying to scuttle the bill without owning the responsibility for its failure.

In peak winter, if a person suffering from cold is offered a sweater, he will not examine it or study its texture and suggest changes to its neck or length. He will wear it anyway, because it protects him from cold. So, if someone refuses to accept the sweater and instead emphasizes on the giver the alterations to be done in the sweater, then there is something wrong. Either the cold or the sweater does not exist in reality.

If the discussions and mindless acts of some members were nonsensical in nature, the end was even more bizarre. The members and the nation were made to believe that the Rajya Sabha proceedings could not continue beyond midnight, and that they had to be stopped at the stroke of midnight just to honor the constitution irrespective of whether any meaningful result has been achieved as a result of the past three days marathon discussions. This rule has been subsequently disputed by many constitutional experts. And that is why, if Hamid Ansari was legally correct in his action, he was ethically wrong; if he was constitutionally correct in his act, he was morally wrong.

It would be too naïve to imagine that Hamid Ansari has taken this daring step at midnight on his own. This is just like saying that Anna Hazare was arrested in August by the Delhi police without the knowledge of Chidambaram. The question is, what has happened to the collective wisdom of UPA II? Where has the political acumen of Pranab Mukharjee gone? Where has the ethical and moral thinking of Manmohan vanished? Where has the analytical ability of Sonia disappeared? Chidambaram and Sibbal have already been extremely busy during past few months to commit blunders after blunders, so their intervention at this juncture was least expected. Even, Rahul occasionally shouts in parliament (after many rehearsals in house) with a written script in his hand and instantly migrates into an imaginary land where he feels that he is the most able person to lead the largest democracy in the world. So, for him to enter the scene with a solution was impossible either.

Did the fear of losing made UPA II do the unthinkable? A person who is afraid of losing cannot perform better. His all efforts go only towards surviving and the real issues get sidelined. Is the country today held hostage by this bunch of politicians, who are ready to forsake anything just to ensure their continuity in the government?

Just imagine, if there was an unexpected aggression from a neighboring country and the Rajya Sabha is discussing on the proposed action plan to tackle this urgent issue. Would Hamid Ansari still call off the proceeding at 12 midnight and say that the rest of discussions would continue in budget session, a few weeks later? Obviously not. Then why, in the face of an internal financial aggression, which while has been happening over past few years and rather intensified in recent months, the Rajya Sabha did not continue the debate to reach a logical conclusion?

The enactment of Lokpal will go down in the history of Indian political system as the most sham efforts ever displayed by anyone to pass a bill.

On the lighter side, let us look at what would have happened, if Hamid Ansari was in a different profession.

If he was a cricket umpire, he would have stopped the one day international match after 47^th over OR a T20 match after 19.2 overs for want of time, when the suspense is at its peak.

If he was a film director, he would not shoot the last two reels for the film, saying that the project had already overshot the timelines.

If he was an actor, he would not utter the last two words of every dialogue.

If he was a teacher, he would skip teaching last two chapters of his syllabus.

If he was a car mechanic, he would not tighten the last two bolts after servicing the car.

If he was a bus driver, he would stop the bus two stops before the destination.

If he was a male air hostess, he would not serve the passengers from last two rows in plane.

If he was a publisher, he would leave the last two chapters of any book blank.

If he was a dancer, he would stop dancing two steps before the music stops.

The list is endless…